Reality Check

Hi! I’m back!!

Thank you for being patient with me while I took a little break to plan my wedding and marry the best guy ever! Here’s a post I started writing back before things got crazy…

 

I posted a throwback picture on my Instagram a while back and was kind of caught off guard by the comments. People really reacted to what I wrote and I realized that I wanted to talk further about what I said.

So this was the photo and caption-

theshoegirl_vacation

theshoegirl_comments

I don’t know why I was surprised by all the comments from people saying that they were in that place in their lives now and that hearing what I said made them feel better. Others asked what I did to change my situation and I just thought I’d share.

So like I said on my Insta post, It was two years ago and I was in a really bad place in my life. After a series of failed relationships; one of which was awful and in the end, kind of scary, I felt like I would never find a man to live happily ever after with. I also found myself in a bad place with friends that judged me and talked behind my back. There was so much drama in my life that I felt like I needed to escape it all. I remember saying to my mom and sisters that I felt like I kept meeting loser guys and backstabbing girl friends.  I had a hard time because usually, when drama surrounds you it’s because YOU are calling drama into your life. Think about it- you and every girl you now says “eww I HATE drama!” But someone is causing it, right?

Laying by the pool on a family vacation, I told my mom and sisters that I needed a change. I’d outgrown my hometown and it didn’t feel like home anymore. I’d lived there for most of my life and although the thought of leaving almost every friend I had was scary, I said that I would see my lease through and if I wasn’t happier by then, I’d move to LA and try to find happiness there.

A week later I was back home and reevaluating my life and those in it. I distanced myself from some people and strengthened friendships with others. I started working out with a trainer and began running more consistently. Healthy body, healthy mind. I created a mini vision board and wrote out a list of what I wanted in my life. I decided that I was going to concentrate on those things and really go after what I wanted. Not everyone needs a partner in their life to make them happy and feel complete, but I’m not ashamed to admit that I am not one of those people. I love love and I love the idea of a long happy marriage and healthy awesome kids. Thats what I wanted… that’s what I asked for.

In June (about 3 months later) I met Jonathan. It was a series of random events- random dating sites and a mutual friend, that brought us together. It was really crazy how the Universe worked it out for us… Jon asked me out by getting my number through the one mutual friend we had (I’ve known said friend since birth basically- his parents grew up with my dad in Morocco) and he told me he’d pick me up and take me out in Laguna Beach even though he lived in LA. I was skeptical and not expecting much, but when he picked me up and stepped out of the car I knew he was different from anyone I had ever met before.

Jon and I fell in love pretty quickly and just like everything else, the timing was perfect. A few months after Jon and I started dating my lease was up on my place in Orange County and a dear friend of mine was looking for a roommate in West Hollywood. I took it as a sign and decided to pack up my life and move it to Los Angeles!

I’ve been here for over two years now and my life is in a totally different place. I have a new family including a big brother and sister, which I never had before- and the most amazing in-laws I could have ever dreamed of. No joke. I have an extended family in Jon’s amazing friends and their wives/girlfriends, and best of all my parents are moving up to LA too! It’s really almost too good to be true. Don’t get me wrong, in the beginning it was tough. Going from hanging out with my girlfriends almost every day to knowing only one person outside of my new boyfriend was really hard! I cried a lot and felt really lonely at times but all in all I’m much happier and am finally starting to feel like I’m “home”!

The reason I write this is because I want everyone to know how your life can really turn around in a very short period of time. You need to be open to change and to lots of possibilities. Laying on that beach in Mexico I NEVER would have thought I’d be where I am today. Seriously.

I also want to remind everyone that Instagram and social media only show the BEST part of our lives… it’s not reality! Everyone has hardships and rough times but most people don’t want to show it or talk about it. It’s just not as attractive. I often say “it’s not real life- it’s Instagram!” and thats so true.

I hope this was helpful or at least amusing, and I look forward to getting back to blogging :) Another thing that I didn’t think I’d be doing again. You really never know……

 

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Comments:

  • Seph Dec.09.2015, 2:05 am

    I am so glad things have gone great for you over the last 2 years and I hope that continues :)

    <a href="http://sephstyle.com"Seph Style Fashion Blog Ireland

  • Stef Nov.14.2015, 2:17 pm

    This was a very honest post, and I’ve been in that bad place for a few months now. I am going to take a page out of your book and create a vision board of what I really want and need. I remember seeing the struggles over the years on your old blog. I hope I am able to reach the happiness you have now.

    I also hope I get the opportunity to learn the business of shoe design from someone amazing like you! Thank you for both your inspiration and your great optimism.

  • mylovinglifestyle Jul.21.2015, 10:17 am

    Thank You for talking about it! It is so important to bring back what really matters. I feel like it’s impossible to feel motivated and always positive these days… Good to hear that your fate turned out so great! Keep blogging! You might not know how inspiring you are! Greets from Europe :)

  • Mira Jul.10.2015, 9:19 am

    Heya! First off, CONGRATS!!!! So happy your happy and hopefully you get some mini-me’s running around soon.

    I have been following you since pretty much the beginning, and it’s been fun being “in” on your life (in a very non-creepy way lol).

    You are a genuinely sweet sweet person and I hope this is an up in your life that just keeps going!

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  • Jessica Jun.22.2015, 9:16 pm

    It is rare that I comment on blogs, but felt I needed to today! I have been following you for a while because of the common love of shoes! But I appreciate your openness and honesty, especially in this post. Congrats on finding love. Wishing you all the best! Please keep blogging (wedding shoes next maybe? :)

  • Very Veronique Jun.22.2015, 12:47 pm

    I’m super glad you wrote this (I’ve been a long time fan of your old blog and your shoe designing and I always love reading anything you write, but this is especially inspirational for me, I’m at a pretty weird place right now in my life and reading this makes me have hope and also motivation.)

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